The Great A12 Punch-Up Mystery

A12A few weeks ago I saw something quite odd.

It was in a layby by the side of the A12 between the Green Man roundabout and Westfield Stratford (if it’s relevant). A single car was in the layby and two men were outside having a punch-up. This wouldn’t have been at all odd if there had been two cars parked. But there wasn’t.

So basically, the driver and passenger in this car had decided to pull over, get out and beat the shit out of each other.

I wondered why.

‘Dave, your driving is crap.’
‘Right! That’s it! Ahtside, nah!’

‘Dave, it was me who drank your pint.’
‘Right! That’s it! Ahtside, nah!’

‘Dave, I slept with your wife.’
‘Right! That’s it! Ahtside, nah!’

Or maybe it was the driver who instigated the punch-up.

‘Steve, stop eating crisps with your mouth open.’
‘Right! That’s it! Ahtside, nah!’

‘Steve, it was me who…’

You get the idea. I have to admit this has exercised my imagination a bit more than it probably should have, but it’s not something you see every day.

Dave and Steve, if by some miraculous conincidence you’re reading this, I’d really like to know why you stopped your car by the side of the A12 in rush hour to beat each other up. There’s a new pint and some crisps in it for you.

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